The dream

This Sunday I turn 24.

It is a strange feeling because the last time I thought about being 24 I was 12. That's because it was a Tiger year and I was thinking.. hmm.. next Tiger year I would be 24!

I used to wonder what I would be doing when I was 24..

Married? Not married?

Would I still be in Malaysia or would I have achieved my dream to be a doctor in some African country with deadly scorpions (no idea how I would ever cope with that considering I scream at the sight of the tiniest spiders!)

Now that I will be 24, it seems I have ditched a few of my 12 year old ideas, achieved some of what I wanted to do and adopted some new ideas along the way (some of which the 12 year old me would probably not be very happy about - like kissing a boy, yucks!).

What would I want for myself when I turn 36?

Well....

I want to be as madly in love as I am now with that fat boy who is super demanding about his lunch!

I want to be a mother and hopefully have children that DO NOT whine too much!!

I want to be self employed (yes I know it's everybody's dream) and have the husband at home running our own business.

I want to move to a place away from London where we can buy a bigger house with a much larger garden where we can then adopt a young collie who will run around like a mad dog.

The saddest thing about all these are that Bronx, Chicken Pie and Wibble will probably not be around when I turn 36.

At the moment I don't know if I can live with that. Talking and thinking about Jake still brings tears to my eyes and we still miss him very very much.

Of course that is life, if I don't ever lose them I will never get to know another dog or rabbit but it is always so hard when you miss something you know you won't see for a very long time.

Anyway..........

That's 12 years to wait and 12 years to enjoy everything we have at the moment and whatever comes in between.